So, yah…FetishCon!!! SO. EXCITED. TO. BE. GOING. Just wanted to take a second and tell you all about it. I’m going at the behest of two of my wonderful custom clients who’re helping me get there by purchasing product generated at the event. And in doing so, I’ll be re-uniting with three lovely ladies who’s absence from the “new” files of TucsonTied has been very long and MUCH maligned, and adding a NEW name to the roster of lovely ladies that I’ve worked with over the 6 years of my career as the producer of TucsonTied/StacieSnowBound. But first, a personal note.
I’m happy to be going for another reason. It’s no secret that Stacie Snow and I are good friends outside of the work…when she went to her first con, I wasn’t able to attend, and I felt really bad about that. Mind you, I know the girl doesn’t need me to hold her hand…quite the opposite, actually; I get the feeling that girl could easily kick my over sized ass and not even work up a sweat in doing so. 
But, I was looking forward to being a friendly face in the crowd to turn to if needed…first FetCon’s are tough, and it’d be nice just to have someone to be able to talk with. I was looking for that during mine…I was so new and green I knew literally no one, and it was a jarring time. Well, this year is Sasha Fae’s first con…and she and I have become pretty good friends outside of the business, so I’ll be happy to be there for her when she starts to see the fun. The guy being led around by a rope attached to his genitals, hands tied behind his back. The guy dressed up as a horse, complete with hooves. The dude with more body hair than I have (and that alone is an achievement…lol) running a pony cart. Nothing wrong with any of those things…but they will be a sight; and I can’t wait to see how she reacts. 
And if she needs to lean, I’ll be happy to be there to receive said lean.
Now…who’m I working with? Well, dear blog reader…the trip to FetCon for me starts with a stop-thru in Atlanta and a shoot on July 31st with the ever-lovely Candle Boxxx.
Candle Boxxx
Originally, the lovely lady and I were slated to work on the Saturday of the con, but her becoming a con Guest Of Honor kinda messed with that happening. Doggone girl, no consideration for her photographers. Yes, that was funny sarcasm; I couldn’t be HAPPIER for her to once again become a FetCon Guest of Honor! It’s a GREAT event for her…but it does limit her time in shooting during the con…and as I wanted 4 hours worth of shoot, well…wasn’t gonna happen on con time, so we arranged it for a couple days before the event actually begins. The thing that I find the most exciting about this is the fact that she and I are going to be able to do an “abduction” scenario in full…hand over mouth, wrestling, bruises, blood raised…
She, by the way, gets the “hand over mouth” and “wrestling”…likely, I’ll be getting the blood and bruises…what does it say about me that I’m looking forward to that?
Next up will be the ever-lovely KOBE LEE!!
Kobe Lee
Been for-EVER since this gal has been in my ropes for TucsonTied…maybe 4 years or more; and what a bloody shame that is! Ah, but she’s on the other side of the country from me and doesn’t get to my side of it much…primary reason for us shooting now. It’s been FAR too long and and it’s a MUCH awaited shoot for me!!!
That would be Friday of the Con…next up on Saturday would be Isobel Wren:
Isobel Wren
I have to admit a certain amount of fondness for this gal. Nothing that’ll get me in any trouble, mind you…I’m a business man running a business, and I know where emotion is properly placed; but an affinity nonetheless. The first time we worked (my last FetishCon), we saw each other in the crowd at the “Fan Photo Shoot” and I asked her if she had someone to tie her…I think she said something along the lines of, “NOW I do,” and snuggled into my chest. How can you NOT have an affinity towards someone who does that? And on top of it all, she appreciates my OCD. I keep my ropebag VERY well organized…all my lines of varying length in tight, neat little bundles…when I first opened the bag, she looked at all the order and positively SQUEALED; that was so cute. Plus, her work did damn good at my site, so I’m looking VERY forward to having new material to post of her…it’s going to be a riotous, FUN shoot!
Finally, on the Sunday of the con, I’ll be working with someone new to me, and I couldn’t be more excited to be shooting with her! Drea Morgan, by name…
Drea Morgan, courtesy of the "Badman", NaughtyTies.com
That pic comes to us courtesy of my best bud who’s worked with her a LOT, the “Badman” of NaughtyTies.com…
Talking with her arranging the shoot has been nothing short of delightful as she has a charming wit that matches her stunning beauty. I’ve wanted to place her on TucsonTied since I first saw her…and when both Stacie and Sasha met her and were very complimentary about her, I KNEW I just HAD to work with this woman.
That’s it for the moment…will update this post as new events allow.
TT
Stacie Snow in black
Stacie Snow and I are closing in on our THIRTIETH shoot together (what’s the “Anniversary Gift” for 30? WRITE ME…I have 2 shoots left before I need to get it!), and I marvel at her ability every time we get together for one. This is one stunning young woman who always turns in the best of the best performance and gives her fans her all towards making really great stuff!!! Over the 28 shoots or so (yeesh…), I’ve managed to get a favorite or two look of her…I must say, I REALLY like Stacie in a “Little Black Dress”, like pictured above…especially when the bondage goes on…
Lady in Black, done up in white rope...Stacie Snow
YUMMY, no? The black pantyhose adds something to those already-stunning legs as well. It’s a GREAT combination that I feel really displays Stacie at her best; we really do some GREAT work together, no?
This part of the shoot was especially fun…as you all know, I had the very bright idea to introduce Stacie to Sasha Fae, and let me tell you; they are getting along BRILLIANTLY! Touring the East Coast as I write this, Stacie and Sasha have hit it off to the point that, according to them, they see each other 6 of the 7 days of the week now; I’m really happy I asked Sasha to attend one of Stacie’s shoots so they could meet. They’ve become extremely fast friends and become very close…not THAT close, you pervs… …but, then again…
Sasha Fae explores a tied Stacie Snow...and it would appear Stacie has no problem with it...
That was a quick candid from the last shoot; don’t they look so CUTE together? Anyway. It was GREAT to see Sasha again; while I tied Stacie for the second segment of this shoot, she and Sasha chatted about almost everything under the sun…right down to where they were going to dinner that night. I’ve done a lot of things wrong is this little career of mine…offended a few folks, gained a few enemies, but when it comes right down to it, I’m all for making money while making the lives of the friends I find along the way a little better…and since Stacie and Sasha are two of my best friends at the gig, I’m proud and happy to have sent them along the path of friendship. May it last forever!
Parting bondage shot, then I’ll sign it…
Black dress, black pantyhose, grey gag...it all works for me. Stacie Snow
Tolstoy
Stacie Snow tied and gagged by the "Second Burglar"
Stacie Snow is having a really crappy day. Imagine coming home, there’s someone in the house. He wasn’t rough about it, but he did tie her up and leave her to struggle while he went thru her belongings. Once done, he left her to struggle with the wrist and ankle bondage, and left her ungagged so she could call for help…
Ah, but the help she GOT!!
The guy knelt down next to her, sat her up and listened as she told him her tale of being burgled and tied, then asked him for release so they could call the police. Instead, he told her that it sucked to be her…as he was ALSO a burglar! Right after that, his hand went over her mouth, silencing her and keeping her from screaming for help…then he decided to see what he’d walked into and pulled down the front of Stacie’s dress, revealing her breasts…
And thus starts “Stacie Snow’s Second Burglar”, my latest ONE HOUR production for TucsonTied/StacieSnowBound! This was prolly the most fun shoot that Stacie and I have had thus far…we had a BLAST filming this! I don’t think I’ve had this much solid fun at a shoot since I shot with Stacie and her sister, Bree…we were having a really great time. Lately, the shoots I’ve been doing have been big…we do enough video to cover a one hour production and then change outfits and do some still work (that’ll be next blog entry), and they can be hard on both of us, her especially…after all, all I’m doing is tying and walking around, spilling out a line or two…she’s tied and gagged and struggling her heart out! But, I have to tell you, Stacie is a real wonder to work with, so bubbly and lively; if it was hard on her, I couldn’t tell, in between the laughter.
He moved Stacie to the floor so he could just watch her struggle...
After the scene described above, Stacie was placed in a chair and allowed to struggle, then to the floor in the pic you see above, then to a hogtie, then he found a hook on one of her walls that he could tie her standing up…
She'd been using the hook for hanging jackets, but it worked for her as well...
The first guy got all her valuables that could be carried, so the second guy took delight in practicing his bondage skill on her, spending an afternoon tying her and placing her in different spots around her home and watching her struggle… Finally, he decided he got his fill and left her tied and gagged on her sofa bed and went on his way, leaving her to struggle and try to get out of the ropework he’d so carefully placed on her….
My overall thoughts on this one? AWESOME stuff! Stacie told me she also loved her performance in this one…she felt she really “hit it” with her portrayal of a gal in this situation; she felt it was more to the actual character of someone who was actually in this situation…and after watching it thru and thru, I have to agree with her; she really NAILED it; you will LOVE her performance in this one!
Other notes…this is my first production with my new HD camera and the image quality is SUPREME. My last camera, after doing 5+ years of venerable production work, was showing it’s age and it was time to get a new one, which I did and it really turned out GREAT! I even got a compliment from Stacie herself for deciding to go with sunglasses on my villain character. Dunno if I blushed when she mentioned it, but it was flattering that she noticed.
“Stacie Snow’s Second Burglar” is coming soon to UnlimitedBondage on Demand and StacieSnowBound.com…I’ll keep ya posted!
Gonna do another blog entry about this shoot…like I said, we did a video section and a photo section…next one’s on the pics.
Tolstoy
"Sasha Fae's Ardent Fan" DVD box art
Second of two new releases…in this one, the perils of fame are explored a bit…
Sasha Fae has taken off in popularity; the only unfortunate side-effect of this can be an unhinged fan base. One such fan has found her, kidnapped her and is attempting to get her to stay with him in this video, “Sasha Fae’s Ardent Fan”. The fan keeps poor Sasha tied and gagged in many various ways, starting out with a chair tie (in which she’s gagged ON CAMERA), followed by an ON SCREEN HOGTIE:
Sasha Fae hogtied for "Sasha Fae's Ardent Fan"
After which he stands her up to get a better look (and better pictures) of her tied and gagged form…
Still for the box art cover of Sasha Fae
After this standing tie, the fan decides to test Sasha’s trust and leaves a pair of scissors within her reach…”Stockholm Syndrome” hasn’t set in just yet, so she immediately goes for them and tries her damnedest to get free before he can stop her…
"Let me go!" cries Sasha Fae thru her gag...
He then moves her to a bed to let her rest…then for the final scene, puts her into a ball tie (on screen tying in this one as well). GREAT video…I was amazed by it!
Personal notes: This was the first time Sasha and I did a “storyline” video and it definitely won’t be the last…she was freaking AMAZING! The words “natural actress” immediately come to mind as I watched this one in post production…she fell into the role of the captive star BEAUTIFULLY and emoted far better than I could have even hoped for…and when it comes to emoting on camera, I hope for a LOT (lol), so you know she did great! If I were able to give out a “Bondage Oscar” for “Best Performance by a Captive Female”, Sasha would DEFINITELY get the win…there were many a time in the filming of it, I wanted to actually “save” her from the situation (which I, myself was the cause of, ironically enough), and my camera man and good buddy (and the guy who discovered Sasha and got her started) Dave Annis, heartily agreed; this was an emotion-filled performance that Sasha sells from minute one…you truly BELIEVE in her as a kidnapped woman who wants to be let go…
Have to say, my favorite parts were when she snapped at my character (the fan) thru her gag to “Stop taking pictures!!!” That was CLASSIC!!
RAW emotion, brilliant performances, bondage to the 10′s…this one has it ALL!! $30 (postage paid) for the DVD; message me personally here for more details.
Tolstoy
Hi gang!!
Got not one but TWO new releases from the TucsonTied Studio to talk with you about: “Mob Daughter Abducted” is the first one. Have to say I’ve been enjoying shooting “themes” lately and this was no exception…this was a FUN video to shoot. Before I tell you about this one, I just want to remind you that “The Kidnapping Of Stacie Snow” is still available from me, either in DVD format ($30: message me privately about that) or from Unlimited Bondage On Demand in Windows Media:
(sorry for such a LONG link; sheesh) A LOT of my product is also available at Unlimited Bondage On Demand…this is a direct link to the store there:
http://estore.surfnetcorp.com/store/UnlimitedBondage/products.cfm?id=241
OK, that done…let’s talk about this release, “Mob Daughter Abducted”. First off, here’s a better look at the cover…
"Mob Daughter Abducted" DVD box art
In this one, Stacie Snow plays the daughter of a mobster. She’s decided she wants out of the Mob life and style and has left the “Family” and it’s violence and connections behind. She’s changed her name and moved on…enter two opportunistic kidnappers who learn the truth…
Kidnapped Mob Daughter Stacie Snow
The kidnapping is filmed ON SCREEN by the two bad guys; choice bits of video will be pulled out and sent to her father with the ransom demand later, but this is the kidnapping AS IT HAPPENS with on screen narrative by the two kidnappers. Most of the bondage is done ON SCREEN (about the only bondage that isn’t is when she’s stood up for a closer view of her lovely body) and the two kidnappers (one on screen, one off) banter back and forth with their captive about the kidnapping, the victim and what’s going to happen to her next…
This one is for the fan that likes banter, on-screen tying and PLENTY of struggling. It’s a touch heavy on story, but focused in the moment of the kidnapping…this is a filming of the kidnapping as it happens…I’m sure you’ll love it!
Message me privately thru the blog for info on the DVD ($30, postage paid)…the WMV file will be released soon thru UnlimitedBondage Video On Demand.
"Left you a pair of scissors if you wanna try and get out, babe..." Yah, that was mean. 
Tolstoy
It’s really good to come to the blog these days and see that I have ZERO spam to put down. Glad to know I bonked off the site the one or two spammers that were troubling us; you are NOT missed.
So…Twitter.
Yet another social site that I belong to (you can see my tweets on the lower right of the blog) and a way to communicate with my fans, let you know my innermost thoughts and such. But within a character limit of 140 letters. That rule can bite me in my lower regions. Point is…I haven’t been using it much lately…the reason being my “haters”. There’s two of them that I’m specifically talking about here, and the both of them are Masters of what I’ve dubbed the “Twitterendo”. Defined:
Twitterendo: Using Twitter to spread hateful propaganda about an enemy in a way that doesn’t say who you’re hating on specifically, but leaves enough room for the reader to know EXACTLY who you’re talking about. EXAMPLE:
“I see certain people have done certain things. That’s certainly awful and even tho I’m talking bad about them I’m still BETTER than them because what they did is certainly something I’D never do. Certainly.”
It’s cowardice PERSONIFIED; striking at someone you hate with vile venom and not having to suffer the consequences for it…I liken it to all the “attack ads” you see when it comes election time; you say PLENTY about your opponent, but literally NOTHING about yourself as a candidate; only that the ad was approved by some money fund somewhere. It’s vile, crude, and almost animalistic…and I was letting it effect me somewhat in that I wasn’t posting much at Twitter to not let my haters get any ammunition from it and use it against me. A good strategy, per se…but it left a silence between me and my fans that I don’t like and really should have gotten past months ago when I blocked both of them from ANY ability to communicate with me thru e-mail, FetLife or any other forms of online communication.
I’m trying to take a new path in life, one that purges all forms of negativity from me…that was the reason I blocked them both. I see their vile garbage about myself or friends of mine, it elicits an emotional response (anger…I’m that much human, at least), so I make it so I can’t see it. Simple as that…and besides, why would I WANT to read the ravings of a child trapped in an adult’s body? Since when do such ravings AMOUNT to anything anyway?
THEY DON’T.
Both of them are small fools who need to get over themselves and destroy the hate they have and turn that introspection that they seem to possess about other people WITHIN and start making THEMSELVES better without childishly, needlessly, foolishly lashing out at the world, trying to make themselves look better by comparison than the people they hate. I’d throw out the word “jealous”…but that would be lashing out myself, and I’m not certain of that fact, and I wouldn’t want to make assumptions where I know nothing…that’s THEIR job.
I don’t make deals with Satan as one of them told their Twitter feed about me, by the way…that was the vilest of the attacks. It’s long since faded into the ether, but it’s still stuck with me as something I truly despise and the defining moment of this crisis. I coined the word “Twitterendo” from this moment…I can’t BEGIN to tell you how ANGRY I was when I saw that tweet; looking back upon it still scares me, I was so angry. And angry over what, really? That’s the crux of this and why I feel he need to write this and become more active again within the online community of public sites I write on like Twitter and FetLife…tho I do have to watch my step at FL as one of them filed a “FetLife Restraining Order” (essentially the site telling both parties to grow up and ignore each other) on me for asking what I’d done now. It is what it is.
Expect to see my “Twitter Widget” on the blog to be a LOT more active…and if you keep anything at all from my ramble here, folks, its this: If you need to know ANYTHING about me, don’t listen to my “haters”, as they know LITERALLY NOTHING ABOUT ME…simply ask me. The only thing haters know is what they WANT you to know; and that kind of garbage is only written from the poor opinion they posses about themselves and a need to feel better about themselves thru bringing others down…I refuse to be brought down again by both of them. They will be what they will be…I can only be me, and if they don’t like that, they can go fuck themselves. HARD.
Yours in overly-worded bloggage,
Tolstoy
I’ve been taking a touch of time off to refreshen myself. I’ve been doing two shoots a month every month for about a year now and I needed some time for me. It’s been a tough road of late…I’ve had a lot of battles off this blog and off of the shooting that didn’t always go so well; I now sit one strike away from losing my FetLife account because of one individual with an attitude, an axe to grind, and a need of a target.
It massively sucked to get that FetLife Restraining Order for doing next to nothing. It’s a suck feeling…I’m not the trouble starter, I’m usually the one trouble is started AGAINST and it really makes me sick to know that someone did this to me. On top of that, I got into a copyright struggle between two warring factions, tried to be a peacemaker and instead wound up being thought of as a “Dickhead”. That fcuking sucked as well…I’m a “Prick” if anything, thank you very muchly. If anything, it gave me the catalyst to just jump right the fcuk outta there and get my fragile self away from BOTH sides of the issue and start focusing on ME…which I wish so many others out there would do.
Talking about focusing on yourself, I find it really weak of people when they feel they have to vent in public…if they were to focus that time on theirselves, it’d be better for the world at large…
And that’s about all for this rant.
T
WOW!!! Dunno how it happened, but somehow all the SPAM on the blog just…stopped. NEAT! I went thru the members and booted folks with names like, “BuyViagraCheap01@spammerzrus.com” and well…no more SPAM to go thru.
VIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICTORY IS MIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!!!
Bwah-hahahahahahaha!!! Feels kinda good, actually. Although, I kinda miss their humorous posts…how am I EVER gonna top the Russian Mob forcing folks to post Viagra SPAM to blogs…
Tolstoy
Hey, Blog Fans!
Another day, another year!! Welcome to 2012…the year to end all years, the year we all go to a hot place in a handbasket, the year where everything as we know it comes to an end…or the year those pesky Mayans simply ran out of stone to carve on. Two Thousand Twelve…2012. Whatever happens, it’s been a wild and crazy ride, and I have to say, I’m loving every minute of it. And will continue to do so in 2013 and beyond.
My last shoot with Stacie Snow has come and gone, and produced quite a nice DVD. I’ve been working on my refining techniques, and while I’m still not perfect, I think I turned out a pretty nice product this time.
"The Kidnapping of Stacie Snow" DVD...1 hour runtime
That’s the DVD case…what’s within is a one hour kidnap drama (with emphasis on the kidnapped girl for a change…lol) with “heiress” Stacie Snow as a “hostage for ransom”, and myself as the nasty, evil masked kidnapper. Several scenes depict Stacie’s kidnapping ordeal…starting with her bound, gagged, and blindfolded on a chair in the kidnapper’s lair. A call to her father is made, setting her ransom at $500,000…then she is re-gagged and left alone to struggle against cruelly tied rope and feel the vibrator tied into the crotch rope pulse unmercifully at her…
Her kidnapper then moves his captive to the floor and allows her to struggle uselessly at the cruelly tight tied ropes. Her kidnapper returns…saying that her father is balking at the demands…he needs pictures of her to convince him to open his wallet and he begins photographing her for that purpose…
"Daddy...please pay the ransom and let me come home!" Still taken during the production of the DVD...
He leaves with his photos and lets her struggle some more…then returns to hogtie the kidnapped heiress (on screen). After this, he’s in a holding pattern, waiting for “Daddy” to open his pockets…with nothing but time on his hands, he decides to tie his captive standing up so he can watch her sexy figure shimmy one way to the next as she tries feebly to keep her balance while tied in this cruel fashion.
"Let's have a look at you, my sexy little captive..." Screen cap taken from the DVD...
FINALLY, her father pays the ransom, so our kidnapper leaves Stacie to struggle on a couch pull out bed while he goes off to get his ill-gotten fortune…she tosses to and fro on the bed and wonders when he’ll be coming back to set her free… Eventually he does return…but only to firmly tie her to the bed (hands over her head to one corner and feet to the other) and leave her there, at the mercy of the directions the kidnapper gave her father to get him to the location she’s being held…
One hour of strict “Little Black Dress” bondage with the lovely Stacie Snow…and the lump that is me, as the kidnapper. $25 ($5 for shipping…$30 total)…drop me a line if you’re interested:
acomicboy@aol.com
Tolstoy
Got some stuff to do today, and I want to get this off my mind and onto “electronic paper” so I can move on. My first ever FetLife RANT that has NOTHING whatsoever to do with the business of producing other than the events happened during my days of producing and interrupted said production. This little something managed to get under my skin and really piss me off. It’s something that made me want to
SSSSSSSSSCCCCCCCRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAMM
and put my fist thru not one, not two, but THREE computer screens…and take a well earned piss on an iPhone. What is my demon? What is the name to my pain?
”Software/Firmware and/or Cell Phone App Updates.” GAH!
You have the app or the software and it runs and is fine. But somewhere out there, some developer with nothing better to do decides to add on an extra…something to increase your enjoyment with the product even more and sends it to you in the form of an “update”. It’s just too bad the update always seems to hit when you’re taking a dump, or doing something else equally important.
I mean really…how many night owls out there in the crowd can’t say they were watching something on NetFlix or playing “Warcraft” (or whatever your geeky gaming heart desires) at 2 in the morning, only to have your computer say,
”Windows has detected two important security updates and has downloaded them. In order for these critical updates to be installed, this computer must be restarted NOW. Because I SAY SO. Implementing restart and interrupting your life in 30 seconds…”
You CAN interrupt the process and put it off…so you tell the thing to wait an hour…ya snarky little ass…and continue to watch said movie or game…only to have that update pop up again in an hour.
”HEY! I told you these are SERIOUS updates, jag-off! Turn off your porn and restart me and let me install them or your computer will blow up and die and THEN where will you be???”
Fiiiiiiiine. You win. So you restart the thing and let it update…and by the time it’s finished, it’s 4 am and you’re asleep in your computer chair…with the password screen waiting diligently for you to enter it and bring the machine back to life. Grand. 
And then, there’s “smartphones” and their apps. I’ve only owned iPhones, so I can only comment on those. On the iPhone apps, when you miss stuff, like say, a text or phone call or @you Tweet from Twitter, it places a red number on the app that distracts my OCD self, reminding me that there’s something there I need to do. NOW. It’s not like the app is pulsing at me to do it…I supply that behavior myself, thank you (lol), the app is just a “trigger” for it. Then, you enter in the updating app factor.
Generally, when an app developer has something new and exciting they want to add to the app, it happens at the least convenient time for you. Most apps can be updated on the fly…enter your password to the iTunes App Store, and the app goes about it’s merry business of updating by itself, without bothering you….unless it’s over 10 mb and the iPhone tells you it needs to be connected to a computer and iTunes to update said app….
And you happen to be in CLEVELAND and half a country away from your home computer at that moment. JOY.
So, for the rest of your day, every time you turn on your phone, you get to see that red number staring out at you…begging and pleading to be updated and done so NOW so that the evil red number of death can be removed from being a blight and eyesore upon your beautiful and precious iPhone screen…
No worries…therapy begins tomorrow. 
The killer, tho, has to be software/firmware updates on the PC. I have three of them…a main PC (which I’m typing on now), a back-up PC (for the “just in case” of a computer failure, and bought just to keep the business running in the event of a shut down of the main one), and a laptop for when I’m being mobile. I’m also tech junkie enough to own two Kodak printers (one for each PC)…I’m hooked on Kodak product; they make good printers.
So anyway…on my last time putting together material for the sites, I was really rolling…producing product both still pics and video up the wazoo…I was a production MACHINE, kicking ass and taking names! I was kinda proud of my little self…I really put together a lot of GREAT product that you fans are gonna LOVE! In the middle of all this, my Kodak printer tells me that the firmware needs to update. Grand.
Again, like before, there was a “Do this (specified time) later” option…but this time I just figured that the update would run in the background while I worked, no big deal. SO NOT SO…my fcuking machine ground to an almost halt while the thing worked away on the update. Then something odd happened…Photoshop closed, all my icons disappeared from the screen and the firmware started on it’s merry way towards completion, downloading from Kodak’s servers what it needed. I think the update somehow decided to restart my machine while it was updating! I killed the update and just restarted the machine to let it update again normally (something got crossed somewhere, obviously)…which it did with no issues, but the machine was now dedicated to the update. Thanks, Kodak. So while I was waiting for this to happen, as my “creative pulse” had faded, I decided to go online and play on my back-up computer…
”New firmware is available for this, your OTHER Kodak Printer! Please stop your life and your fun once again and update THIS PRINTER’S FIRMWARE, TOO!!!”
You Sonofabitch! Now, I’m at a near rage, but laughing inside at how my computers were seeming to rebel all at once on me…would the laptop follow sort? I turned it on and, since it wasn’t connected to a printer needing a firmware update, I THOUGHT it was fine….but it was moving slow as molasses. Ah, great, here comes a virus, thinks I…and just as I’m about to start up my Advanced System Care to have a look at the problem, the laptop gleefully announces in a VERY sexy feminine voice,
”AVAST, Virus System Database, has been UPDATED!”
My anti-virus program was updating in the background, taking up all the laptops available resources to do so, making the laptop seem slow! So, keeping score now…a system update of some kind kicked me in the ass not one, not two, but THREE times in less than a few minutes! The anger broke, and I laughed my fool head off! Autumn Shaylee called me in the midst of all this foolishness and told me she’d never heard me this angry…maybe she should get over right away and let me tie her up again?
I wouldn’t be opposed to that…lol.
Didn’t happen tho…she was off to do family stuff and just called to check in on me. She said she’d NEVER heard me this angry before…it was kinda amusing. What wasn’t amusing was how high I jumped when the phone rang…I was so into solving all these problems it scared the literal crap outta me…lol!
This stuff slammed me once again yesterday. The day started out normally enough and my computers were fine…then all of a sudden, I kept getting “Firefox cannot connect to the server” error messages. WTF? My bill was paid up, I had all 4 lights on my modem lit…why wasn’t the computer connecting? It SAID it was connecting to the Internet…???
I called my ISP twice (and am now convinced that they all live in INDIA) and was stunned that they knew next to nothing about FireFox…they wanted me to do all my probing into this via Internet Explorer….who uses THAT anymore?! Apparently, my ISP does…lmao! They were useless…and I battled it out on my own.
“Help” line? More like a “Helpless” line…lol.
Did a fair job of it and managed to get FF to connect to sites like Twitter, Facebook and others, but intermittently…sometimes it would work, other times it wouldn’t. This was really weird and it was like nothing I’d seen before. Then, my laptop did something unexpected and something that I wouldn’t have thought would help…
It found and collected an SOFTWARE UPDATE for Adobe Flash Player.
Thinking nothing of it (but having the same problems on the laptop as on the desktop), I downloaded the update and installed it…and the fcuking laptop worked fine now and accessed the Internet perfectly again.
Who KNEW Flash Player was so DAMNED important???!
So, I struggled to get the desktop to get the update (I was still getting error messages when trying to connect with Adobe), but eventually got it to download…and my computer is fine and fully functional once again. Go fcuking figure…FLASH PLAYER. And a SOFTWARE UPDATE kicks my ass once again and paralyzes my computer fun for a FULL DAY while I stoopidly tried to figure it all out.
I want a goddamn discount the next time I buy an updated version of Adobe Photoshop Elements to compensate me for lost computer fun time…lol.
And there’s my rant. Goddamn fcuking updates…if the shyte is working, leave it the fcuk alone and don’t fcuk with it!!!
(steps down from rant soapbox, bows, and taps out.)
Tolstoy
Recent Comments